When under pressure, good people can become assh@les

My partner and I are facing an issue we didn’t expect. The last people to move in our new residence have done so, 3 weeks ago and since then, it has been a crazy ride. 

We were worried their kids would be loud and indeed they are! However, we didn’t expect what happened with the parents. Now, worst may be on its way and we have no idea what to do about it, if anything.

pretty yellow flowers
Pretty flowers to not think about the ugliness around

Yesterday, on a Sunday evening in a country where Sundays are religiously quiet, things got heated again and noisy. Very noisy. It sounded like furniture was moved, things were thrown around and smashed.

For a while, it became silent. After screaming proficiently and insulting his wife (again), he left for a walk. Probably to calm down. It didn’t work and actually got worst afterward.

Last week end, she was out for the weekend on a girl’s trip and he spend the weekend shouting over the phone, insulting and threatening her. He believed she was with her lover and kicked her out. He got all of her clothes out on their terrace. At least he didn’t throw them on the street!?!

He did this while his kids were home with him. I am childfree, but I feel this is a big no-no!

This morning, their coffee machine was lying in the dirt in their garden, shattered. Actually it still is there this evening.

These are our downstair neighbours. We moved in recently, in a small residence, which was perfectly quiet before they arrived. Sure, if someone was drilling a hole, we could hear it, but overall it seems like a pretty well built residence with good insulation, because most times, there is no noice.

How things changed 3 weeks ago, when they arrived.

My partner and I have trouble with the noise. It’s nerve wrecking for us. We wore earplugs yesterday evening while reading. We could still hear them fighting, but it was muffled.

Yet, something changed in the middle of it. We got scared. We realised that one day the police might knock on our door, to ask us if we had witnessed anything suspicious. We realised that one day, the noice might stop abruptly because she will be injured or worst.

But is it really the case or are we being overly dramatic?

He sure has a bad temper. He sure has no consideration for others including his wife, his kids and certainly not for his neighbours. He clearly doesn’t care if people see or hear what’s going on. The fights are done with windows wide open.

But is he a bad enough person to kill his wife? Hopefully not?! I don’t know. How could I know?!

Moving is nerve wrecking. I couldn’t sleep for months before and after we moved. When not sleeping well, I’m not my most charming self to say the least! I don’t scream because it isn’t my way of communication. I don’t break things because I’m the one who would have to repair them. But clearly, if I had kids in addition to moving, I would have probably gone a little crazy.

We do not know him, maybe he has plenty of other things to deal with. A stressful job, difficult situation with his parents, other people to take care of, financial problems… Maybe he is under an enormous amount of pressure.

Yes, I think good people, under lots of pressure, can become assh@les. They certainly become more selfish, self centered. They behave out of their normal range.

Does this justify his behaviour? No, but it might explain it. It might also mean that this too will pass.

I’m trying to reassure myself that it’s going to be ok. Nothing horribly bad is going to happen.

Really, I’m trying to find a silver lining, but I feel lost.

If you have any recommendations, please do not hesitate to share.

My sunshine!

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