December was not what I was hoping for and not what it seems

I was on a roll. I could feel it and yet there were more bumps on the road to come.

October had been great. I had called November uneventful. By all means this referred to ‘unpleasant events’, the types I had been experiencing the previous years. Because in fact, November had brought good things including one very big, very nice good thing indeed.

I was just happy.

But when I arrived for another extended weekend at my dad and saw him, all the joy left my body and my soul. He was sick, he was knocked down. My brother had seen him 3 days before but I don’t think he had eaten anything since then. What 2 or 3 days without food can do to an older person is scary. I’m more relaxed about it now, but when I saw him, I got very scared this was the end. He thought so too. I fed him, took care of his fever, his sore throats etc. And by the time I left, he was almost back to normal.

I had one day home before going to London for my next trip and of course, I got sick too. Raging fever, shivers, body aching from head to toes. Yes, I took my flight anyway, sorry. I had plans I couldn’t postpone. It was tough but I managed and pushed through and then crashed and slept a lot!

Still managed to finish what had to be finished and I felt liberated. There is one more thing that needs to be handled and then I will find a way to mostly remove myself from this mess.

Thankfully after that, Christmas was upon us and as usual, my partner and I went back to see my dad. Which meant he was again well fed and well taken care of for almost 10 days. And well entertained!

Nugget of wisdom: Being mature is knowing when to not give a f@ck

It’s just a point of view, but yes, I feel that maturing is not giving a f@ck or at least, knowing when to give a f@ck.

There are plenty of ways to achieve that. To train yourself to feel what is important and what is not. One of them is to consider if this thing, that is turning your inside upside down, will be important in 5 years time. The likely response is probably not.

It’s just one method to gain a new zen attitude. You do you and find what works for you.

It’s hard because, it is often impossible to see the consequences of an event on a grant scale. There are certainly plenty of small decisions that we take one day, which seems insignificant at the time, for they are tiny pieces of a huge puzzle, which turn out to be the missing link, the spark that lit up the way to something else.

Yet, maturity requires more than matching tea towels, a nice home and paid bills. Maturity is a balancing act. One where you know what is important, where you know how to behave appropriately, where you are capable of handling the sh!t that is thrown at you and also know where not to give a f@ck without upsetting people around you.

Maturity is a gift that needs to be mastered!

Achievements and Gratefulness

I’m so grateful I accepted to go to Paris for a quick weekend. I was reluctant and yet we went to see a marvellous play and it filled my soul with happiness.

My time with my dad was terribly hard so I must reiterate how thankful I am he is still here. And on board with my countless mischiefs!

Going to London while sick was tough but things got done and I’m thankful to the guys who helped me finish up the renovation project I had started. We had a good time too.

And for the first time in more than a year going there regularly, I escaped and went to London! It was a marvellous and very interesting. See pictures below!

Meanwhile, it is a miracle my clients are not upset with me and I still managed to fulfil all my obligations including a nice Christmas party! Hugely thankful for that!

Christmas and New Year were spent with my dad and we had a great time with my new big crazy project! I’m in love again!

I can’t say I’m impressed by the few workouts I managed to squeeze in such a packed schedule. This will be for next year!

While pondering about this last month, I feel it might be the whole year that wasn’t what it was hoping for, not just December. But along the way, good things happened. Difficult things too – Really difficult ones. Maybe it’s the whole year that has not been what it seems.

While I was eager to finish up certain things, I wasn’t in such a hurry to see this year end. It came as a surprise to me. I’m not entirely happy with this year achievements, but I’m not entirely disappointed either.

What I’m reading

I’m still lost with all the books on my night stand! I have been mainly reading The Psychology of Money: Timeless lessons on wealth, greed, and happiness by Morgan Housel – affiliated Amazon link. A ‘classic’ book that is often recommended to explore your money mindset. I don’t have an opinion to share. I could just say that I should have read this before. It is less useful to me, at the stage I’m at.

You may remember that I had planned to read one book a month this year. Although it wouldn’t look like much to a lot of people, it was a challenge for me, considering how little I had read the previous year. I lost count at one point but I think it did pretty good.